New Goal

I don't really set New Years Resolutions but this year I have decided I want to appreciate my body better. It is so easy to focus on all the parts of your body that you want to change. I want to focus on everything that my body has allowed me and continues to allow me to do in my life. While I don't feel I've ever obsessed extremely over the way my body looks, I'm never completely satisfied and to be honest I'm not saying this goal is to BE completely satisfied with the way my body looks but rather to accept it, and to be GRATEFUL for it. I don't think I'll ever love the shape of my legs but I love that they have carried me through almost 30 years of life. I will never love my stretch marks but I love that my stomach has carried 3 healthy children and because of that I can accept that I may never have that tight stretch mark free stomach again. This doesn't mean I won't continue to strive for a better looking body but that I will stop complaining and comparing. I want my body to continue to carry me through this life and I believe that working out and eating healthy is a major role in that. My body is not perfect looking but it has served me well and for that I love it.

P.S. You know what got me thinking about this? American Idol last night. Did you see it? The boy who's fiancee got in an accident and suffered a traumatic brain injury? He's still by her side. Had me crying, got me thinking...

New Pics

Leila's six month pictures. Thanks once again to my dear friend Paige. I'm so lucky to have friends who are so good at what they do!
Love 'em, love her, enjoy.

6 months

6 months, really? Half way to a year? I can't even believe my little newborn is gone. We are definitely in a good stage right now and I really love it. At 6 months Leila

Has started playing in her exersaucer and loves it.
Started grabbing for toys more.
Still doesn't like to roll, I think she might just skip this all together.
Is starting to sit up with a little support still.
Loves her baths.
Will smile at anyone that looks at her.
Sleeps 8-10 hours at night.
Is down to a 2 nap a day schedule, at least when I'm home for her naps.
Started solid foods, just veggies and oatmeal for now.
Didn't cry at all when she got her vaccine.
Will still stay swaddled if I swaddle her but I've stopped so she can self soothe with her fingers if she needs to.
Is drooling a lot.
Has started to need more than the milk I can provide.

I had to start supplementing a little with formula because I think she just wasn't getting enough anymore. I give her 2 oz before each nap and 4 oz before bed. I am a little bit sad but this is about when I stopped nursing with Charlie and Kenya for this reason so I figure if I just supplement a little and still nurse that's better than nothing. Plus it's helping her at night. Sometimes she doesn't quite make it 8 hours and I've let her cry it out the past couple nights. She cries for 30ish minutes and will go back to sleep until it's been at least 8 hours. Last night it was 10 so I hope she sticks to it.

I'm glad she's been a bit slower on her motor skills because it lets me hold on to her babyness. Funny how you're so excited for the first to do everything, even the second, but now I'm like "don't you dare think about crawling!" and "Yay, she's not rolling yet." Love this babe.

Love the drool droplet.

How 'bout those jeggings? Aren't they cute?

Eye Surgery and Things

Kenya's eye doctor, Dr Hoffman, told us on December 22 that she was going to need another surgery. We were not happy because that meant he couldn't get her in until February which means another $5,000 deductible, which is what happened to us the first time around because his office couldn't get us in for 3 months. This time he had to change our appointment from the first of December to the 22 and because of that couldn't get us in for surgery before the end of the year. Well Mark was mad. (I was too but luckily Mark has the balls to actually do something about it.) I did say something at her appointment, he said "sorry, wish I had more surgery days but I don't." So I said okay. Mark called and talked to lots of people and pleaded our case, even got the doc to talk to him on the phone, which really just made him more mad because he was not nice or sympathetic, just bad bedside manner. Anyway after lots and lots of phone time we were able to get a great recommendation, get an appointment, AND get scheduled for surgery on the 29th. Mark is good. We LOVE our new doctor Dr. Peterson. For the first time in 3 years we feel like we understand what is going on with her eyes, he was awesome.

So what is going on with her eyes? Let me fill you in. She was born with cross eyes which is really a neurological problem so the only way they know how to fix it is with eye muscle surgery. Her first surgery Dr. Hoffman loosened the inside muscles to try and get the eyes to straighten out. It helped a lot but they were still crossing and up drifting when she looked down mostly. This surgery Dr. Peterson tightened the outer muscles and the lower lid muscles to help with the up drifting and crossing, and so far her eyes look really good. There's a 20% chance that she could need another surgery down the road, even 10-20 years down the road because the brain sometimes just doesn't want to keep them straight. It doesn't effect her vision, it could effect her peripheral vision and depth perception if she didn't get it fixed. So goodbye Dr. Hoffman, we will not return, thank you Dr. Peterson for making us feel like you care. (I hope I'm not offending anyone if you go to Dr. Hoffman, he is a great Dr., I know that, just a little too arrogant for our liking.)

Here is Kenya before surgery. Sad little girl.

After her surgery they let one parent go back until they moved her to post op. Mark really wanted to be the one to go back, I did too, but since he made this surgery happen I let him go back first and comfort our little girl.

She slept and slept for the first few hours after her surgery. She didn't want to open her eyes because she said they hurt. She was asleep on our couch at home and I heard her crying. I came downstairs and she was wandering around with her eyes closed saying "I want to leave, I want to leave momma!" She thought we were still at the hospital, a little delirious still, so sad. I picked her up, comforted her and put her back on the couch, she went right back to sleep.

Day after surger, puffy red eyes. Whenever anyone asks her what happened to her eyes she says "I got bwood in my eyes." She threw up the day of surgery while she was going to the bathroom from the anesthesia. She told Charlie her pee came out of her mouth. She told her friend the next day she had a fever and she throwed it up. Later that day she went into that bathroom and said "Mom, where's my fever?" I said "I cleaned it up Kenya." She said "Oh, I wanted to see it." :)

Three days after her surgery she was running around the house, tripped and banged her brow bone on the door frame. Huge goose egg right away and a really good black eye.

So she had, still has "blood" in her eye and a black eye, she was pretty.

Leila graduated to the big tub, I've been giving her baths on the counter in her tub. The kids were excited and wanted to join her.

ohh, I just want to squish her!

Kenya fell asleep on Mark like this the other day, she really did have a fever. This has never happened, ever. He liked it.

I have my kids make their own beds every morning. It would be so much easier for me to just do it, and look so much better but I'm trying to teach them a good habit. This is how Charlie made his this morning. Love it. He was proud.

I will leave you with another great picture from Kenya of Snow White, Prince Charming, and the three fairies catching a ride in the back.

Nursery Graduation

Kenya graduated from nursery. Her teacher was so cute and held this little graduation ceremony. She is excited to be a sunbeam, but I know she misses nursery too, well at least the snacks. Here's to hoping she learns to sit better in her seat than her brother who I got to chase around the building numerous times when he was a sunbeam.

Christmas

Merry Christmas! We had a really nice Christmas this year. Charlie didn't wake up until 7:00, which was a big improvement from last year. The night before he said "Mom, what time can we open presents?" I said "What time do you think?" He said "8:00?" "Sounds good to me!" I said. I was quite surprised by the response but all over it. By 7:30 all the kids were up so we got started a little early. :)

About to open their stockings.

Opening stockings.

No pictures during the chaos but here's all the loot after.

Leila got a bear from Oma.

Kenya and all her princess dolls from Santa. She wanted an Ariel doll so she was excited to see all the other dolls too.

Santa brought Leila a chair.

Santa played a little trick on Charlie. On one of his last presents he opened up a razor scooter from Santa (he wanted an electric scooter), Mark and I said "Oh Santa must have been confused and got you a regular scooter." He was trying to have a good attitude about it. He said "Well, it's really shiny and I've always wanted a razor scooter too." We said "Maybe Santa thought you weren't big enough yet for an electric scooter." Charlie said "Maybe next year." Mark and I were quite proud of him for putting on a good face, it was the last present he opened so we were winding down and he got pretty quiet, you could tell he was just trying to act glad for all the other stuff he got but he was a little disappointed. Then Mark said "Charlie, I think I see something in the office, what is that?" He ran over there and said "It's my motor scooter!" He was so excited.

Kenya was pretty excited about this little dress.

And this doll house.

So cute!

When I was uploading my pictures I found these that Kenya took. They gave us a good laugh.

I love how she set these guys up.

We had a relaxing day and didn't have anywhere to go until 2:00 when we headed over to my dad's for dinner.

It was nice to not be running around from place to place. We came home from my dad's and watched a movie with the kids. A great Christmas!

Christmas Eve

We decided to shoot for bowling again this year. Kenya kept saying to me "I can go mamma, I'm a big girl." I'm not sure why she was concerned that I wasn't going to let her go but bowl she did. Colby and Cami and their families came too. Fun times.




That night we went to Maurena's house for our traditional Christmas Eve with the Holbrook side.




The kids went straight to bed when we got home, after leaving hot chocolate for Santa and the reindeer food that Kenya made at preschool of course.